Jihad on you! is a satirical website for venting frustrations. Its creators do not condone any kind of violence.
Find out more | Contact infoI declare a jihad on you for not acknowledging my presence and for not being online late into the night!
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Declared by Crocy on Sunday, November 11, 2007
Im back on this site. Hehehehe! Nope, really going to stay away from that other forum. This time i mean it!! Its a death trap (figuratively speaking). Because so many people (i think) are on there. Gives girls more of a reason to talk about me. Anyways, I hope that internet troll on that other site follows...
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Declared by dfgsdfg on Saturday, July 9, 2011
Marianne is always talking to me while I'm at work. I tell her, I've got things to do. She doesn't care. She just talks and talks. It's like she doesn't have any friends. She just goes on talking about her rat boyfriends and her trips to far away exotic lands. It's just all too much. I'm trying to think...
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Declared by Chris on Monday, September 10, 2007
To all those people who eat loudly and with their mouths open - please please will you stop. It's revolting and I can sometimes see what you're eating let alone the fact that I am deafened by the squelching and slurping, chewing gum like a cow - stop it!
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Declared by Anonymous on Tuesday, October 9, 2007
I declare jihad on YOU!!!
Every time I reach out with my arms wide open, you turn your face away from me like you don't fucking notice me. I'm NOT a rapist, I'm just a huggy person!! There's a difference you know.
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Declared by Huggy Person on Wednesday, April 8, 2009
The Dallas Mavericks are probably the sorriest team in the NBA.
They've got a two-bit owner, they're choking dogs in the playoffs, and man, their fans really need to buy a brush and get a haircut.
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Declared by Doug on Wednesday, October 10, 2007
I declare jihad against all those text messaging psycho chicks who just can't put the damn phone down. In the car, while driving walking down the street, a hall, in the store. Get the F out of the way. No one cares that you are buying vitamin water. No one wants to know what you think. Put the phone...
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Declared by Big Sam on Sunday, August 24, 2008
I declare Jihad on you for kicking me in the stomach you bitch.
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Declared by hairy nuts on Monday, October 29, 2007
For stealing my car to play wargames with another grown man instead of meeting me at the train station after a week away, and forcing me to take an hour and a half of bus journey instead of a 20 minute drive...
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Declared by Rae on Friday, February 15, 2013
So sad if you feel the need to bully and harass white people, especially white people who have done nothing hostile towards you. Very creepy o f you.;
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Declared by AnonymousLady on Saturday, October 17, 2015
I declare a jihad on you horsey people who give your kids (aka Spawn of Satan) horses at 11 years old and send them out as some kind of jihad against the ordinary public. Your spawn of Satan have no control over these horses and are a danger to society at large.
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Declared by Anonymous on Monday, November 21, 2011
I'd like to know who the ass clown is that decides when to paint lines on the road? Today, as I'm driving to work in pouring down rain, the yellow center line is running to the shoulder of the road, like shit running down your leg after a nasty SHART! My only thoughts are the environment as paint pools on...
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Declared by Rich Rod on Tuesday, September 11, 2007
Putting aside the theme parks and the tourists, Orlando is one of the shittiest places I've ever lived. The people, the (lack of) culture, and the (lack of) good food! And could they have a decent gay club for crying out loud!
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Declared by Brian on Sunday, October 7, 2007
The Papyrus typeface. it's just awful.
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Declared by James on Monday, October 8, 2007
This is the last straw! I have had it with your short, bitter, feathered ass! You don't mess with a dude's benz and get away with it. And by the way, you call me Goofy one more time you crack smokin', walking personality disorder, and I will bury your ass next to Walt. It's Shabaz Ahmed. It's been legal...
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Declared by Shabaz Ahmed (The artist formally known as Goofy) on Tuesday, October 30, 2007
Stop buying clapped out motors ya dick u had a relly nice mr2
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Declared by the voice of reson on Thursday, November 29, 2007
Jihad on you, you insufferable wannabe. I hate your repulsive knitwearing guts with a passion more passionate than the passion with which the positive pole of a magnet hates the negative pole of another magnet. I despise your sunset photography and your fake accent and your obnoxious self-presentation, and,...
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Declared by IT's dedicated groupie on Thursday, December 9, 2010
Hey Dick head. When are you going to get out of that hell hole you are working in and get a real job? Still kissing Rons ass? What about Eddie's ass?
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Declared by Anonymous on Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Is that all you have. Pathetic. I am sitting back laughing so hard at you right now, trying to scramble around and find something to get on me. Pathetic.
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Declared by Anonymous on Friday, July 8, 2011
For eating small children
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Declared by Anonymous on Saturday, October 13, 2007