Jihad on you! is a satirical website for venting frustrations. Its creators do not condone any kind of violence.
Find out more | Contact infoYou are a school principal and an old, ugly one at that! You're having an affair with a mother at your school - half your age and pregnant - and preaching to me and everyone else about ethics and equity?
Where is the equity at home where your wife and little kid loved you (silly me) and believed your...
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Declared by Anonymous on Wednesday, February 20, 2008
You stole my goats and women for sex and money, and you must die by the fire of Allah's eyes!
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Declared by Muhammad al-Faziz bin-JERKALABAKAD on Friday, November 7, 2008
Why do all of you little boys have to use such limited vocabulary? What the fuck does fuck mean? Use words that express something, not just impersonal cliches. Think a little, it makes you more attractive.
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Declared by Katrina on Saturday, December 13, 2008
Baby killer! You think you're so noble because you're against water boarding a terrorist who wants to kill millions of people, but you have NO PROBLEMS KILLING an INNOCENT BABY!! Want to know what partial birth abortion is for all you dumb cunt fucks out there? It's when an almost fully-developed baby is...
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Declared by hellwithyou on Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Fuck! I want to turn down the sound, not mute it!
Whoever programs this shit needs a kick up the asshole.
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Declared by Never buying HP shit again, or Compaq. on Monday, February 15, 2010
Yo bitch. who you fuckin around with these days. I heard yo got a new sucka on da side. yo pussy done wore out bitch. I did it. you slutty bitch ho.
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Declared by Anonymous on Friday, April 23, 2010
Outlook, damn you and all of your piss poor ass programmers and company. Bastard app of crap, why did you tell me the meeting was tomorrow when it was actually today? You are hated.
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Declared by Ben on Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Ryan Higa, AKA "NigaHiga," has been the most subscribed Youtuber for far too long!!! Most of his subscribers don't even watch his videos!!!
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Declared by The Book of HA on Thursday, June 3, 2010
Bomb the shit out of israel,they are the children of Satan
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Declared by Anonymous on Tuesday, January 4, 2011
A lie by omission is still a lie. cmon pimping stop the bullshit forreal forreal!
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Declared by Anonymous on Sunday, October 23, 2011
Hey Douche Bag. Wanna play games with me? Check for an I.E.D. under your bed, your car, even your mailbox shit head.
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Declared by Jackie Jihad on Wednesday, April 18, 2012
What the fuck is so cool about this guy? He screams gay to me. He fucking acted in Mickey Mouse Club, motherfuckers, Mickey Mouse Club! That club has produced tons of trainwrecks like Britney (she's cool now, but she had her dark times), Xtina (was cool, but I think she's doing coke right now), and...
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Declared by falafel on Tuesday, October 16, 2012
You tell me that ill be out of work for a few weeks due to guys in the shop quitting and no steel to put up, then i find out everyone else is still working and when i confront you, you tell me some bullshit lies, you are just intimidated by my being a real man and you being an insecure bitch whos wife and...
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Declared by Mike on Saturday, August 23, 2014
JIHAD ON YOU, JIHAD ON YOUR MOTHER, JIHAD ON YOUR COW
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Declared by jihad jhon on Tuesday, April 21, 2015
To everyone at the wine tasting table at last weekend's wedding:
All of you were gushing about the wine selection and how delicious and wonderful it was. Bullshit! It was disgusting because wine is always disgusting. It tastes like chemicals.
When you say you "love" a glass of wine, aren't you really...
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Declared by Ashley on Tuesday, September 11, 2007
Damn you, slightly obscured and wobbly mixed-cap text! I thought you wanted XogH8, but no... you wanted x0gHB!!! Horse farts!!!
All I wanted to do was buy my front-row Nickelback tickets, but after two hours, you've relegated me to nosebleed status. I'm a rocker, not friggin' Robert Langdon!!!
Was...
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Declared by Todd E on Wednesday, September 12, 2007
The only jihad that makes sense here is the jihad on this website. Jihadonyou will find out all about jihad soon enough.
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Declared by Mohamed Talabani on Monday, October 8, 2007
"I'm placing a jihad on you!"
"Just, like, whatever.."
You will burn in the fires of hell for being such a pathetic way of ending a conversation.
Nothing about you is funny. The people who use you are not funny. The world would be a better place without you.
You are a statement used by a generation...
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Declared by Garry on Monday, October 8, 2007
My evil sisters for letting there 3 year old daugters jump on my head when i was sleeping
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Declared by chris on Thursday, October 18, 2007
You, my poor friend are the one possessed by the Cake! The only sin I will ever commit is the inhalation of your world view. I will banish you to the recesses of the universe, where the light of every star and galaxy twinkles as bright as the faintest night star.
O vengeful Pie! May you lend me the strength...
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Declared by WowThatsAwesomeQT on Wednesday, June 10, 2009