Jihad on you! is a satirical website for venting frustrations. Its creators do not condone any kind of violence.
Find out more | Contact infoI'm so addicted to pornography and its taking over my life :(
FOR THAT REASON, I DECLARE JIHAD ON MYSELF
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Declared by Jihadi Jihadist on Saturday, May 26, 2018
Have you heard the one about Mohammed and the nine year old girl and the woman he raped?
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Declared by Michael Smith on Monday, October 8, 2007
Dam pedo
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Declared by bigchris on Monday, October 8, 2007
We will fight to the last man and automaton for the AStu-talo! We already won the first battle.
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Declared by AS on Tuesday, October 9, 2007
VĂ¥ga in slava o martyra sent idag med!
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Declared by Anonymous on Wednesday, October 24, 2007
You are an infidel and a Cristian you must be killed, i place an informal JIHAD on you!
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Declared by Tom on Wednesday, September 3, 2008
I AM SO MAD FOR NO REASON AND I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA CRY BUT I DON'T WANT TO GO BACK ON ANTIDEPRESSANTS. GAH.
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Declared by whiny white girl on Monday, December 31, 2012
I hope when most of you are arrested I hope when you go to jail you get raped up the ass by everyman in jail without lube. To make sure you get no lube I hope the guys cum on the floor isntead of up your ass. No lube for you! I hope you get raped with giant metal baseball bats without lube either. Better yet...
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Declared by Dude on Friday, March 22, 2013
Middle siblings
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Declared by Jay on Monday, October 8, 2007
Let me out!
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Declared by Katie Holmes on Wednesday, December 19, 2007
This guy has no fuckin' character, he's a fuckin' four year old child who shoplifts whenever you take him to the fuckin market! Pissant piece of shit....
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Declared by Anonymous on Thursday, November 5, 2009
Why would you dare to state there are only 24 hours in a day and force us to cram 29 hours worth of stuff into it. Jihad on you society for forcing me to attempt to give up, YOU SHALL ALL BE DESTROYED!!!
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Declared by art on Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Last time I checked a "shower" doesn't last FIVE HOURS
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Declared by Manny on Monday, June 16, 2014
i hope you burn in hell for making me live in it. i hope you realise someday that taking away my life is not going to make yours any better. i hope you die so i can live without you controlling every fucking aspect of my life. i hope you realise that the year's worth of self harm on my arms is not "the cat."...
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Declared by Anonymous on Tuesday, December 1, 2015
Los Angeles MTA bus service I is the worst, because the lazy bus drivers are always late, sleeping at their stopover instead of picking up passengers. The drivers for Bus Lines 150 and 240 along Ventura Blvd. in the southern San Fernando Valley area of Los Angeles are particularly guilty of this. Lazy...
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Declared by frustrated passenger on Monday, January 23, 2017
I hate people that can't take a joke. Someone pinned the "9 satanic sins" to the board in the honors lounge because they thought it was funny we had a babtist student center, but nothing for other religions. Everyone, even the super religious kids, that came in either didn't pay attention to it or found it...
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Declared by Anonymous on Tuesday, February 27, 2018
Only infidels approve their own requests for change.
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Declared by Anonymous on Monday, June 25, 2012
Fuck you, you fucking fuck. You treated me like shit, and then when you left me, your last words were "I'll miss you, but not the way you treated me" like I abused you! GO FUCK YOURSELF. After two years of dating, you wouldn't even fucking kiss me on the lips because you wanted to save your kiss for someone...
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Declared by Jay on Monday, April 27, 2015
What happened during lunch today? I went to Checkers after a morning of fairly interesting presentations and returned to the most brain-numbing drivel this side of the pond.
I'm glad I paid for the workshops and came for the whole weekend. If I had come just for this, I'd be seriously pissed.
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Declared by Sleeping in the back row on Friday, February 29, 2008
Seriously. Two hours of wide ranging and interesting conversation, then you decide to just start ignoring me when you discover my sexual preference. (something that I was done talking about after one line) It's amazing how ridiculously shallow a person can turn out to be after seeming so deep and...
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Declared by Louis on Tuesday, December 8, 2009