Jihad on you! is a satirical website for venting frustrations. Its creators do not condone any kind of violence.
Find out more | Contact infoI am going to jihad you, Glenn. Why won't you accept my advances? I just want you for one last infidelity. PLEASE - homosexuality isn't a crime. It is a righteous passion, and we will not be judged for it.
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Declared by Woody on Thursday, February 5, 2009
Jihad on you and your twin and your family. Infidel!
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Declared by Anonymous on Thursday, January 29, 2009
She is promisicuos and sleeps with multiple men in the fire stairs behind my back!!!!!JIHAD!!!!!!!
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Declared by #1 Jihad on Tuesday, April 13, 2010
iefw
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Declared by Anonymous on Monday, June 27, 2011
We've been together for a whole fuckin year.
When a rumor surfaces, don't go all angry and i-am-leaving-you and he-deserves-me-better and you-will-never-change on me, damn it.
You trust that gossiper more than me, who's supposed to be your fuckin man!
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Declared by JQM on Saturday, February 25, 2012
you broke my heart.
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Declared by Anonymous on Saturday, June 1, 2013
What the fuck kind of name is Realtors anyway? You're a real estate agent that bribes a corporation to give you your fancy smancy name. Who gives a fuck?
I don't give a shit of I get my burritos from a Cookator or not, or my car fixed be a Mechanitor, or my lovin' from a Prostitor. I sure as shit don't...
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Declared by NAR jazeera on Sunday, October 7, 2007
Just because you're ancient doesn't mean you can treat others like crap! Stop being so lazy and stop bullshitting and try working as hard as the rest of us. Maybe then you can rest in peace at the end of the night, you louse.
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Declared by Anonymous on Monday, October 8, 2007
Tu ne m'as pas répondu si les rafraîchissements offerts pendant la course incluaient de quoi manger/
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Declared by René on Monday, October 8, 2007
Holy war on you!
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Declared by Mistr Pavel on Monday, October 8, 2007
F*CK POP IDOl, Star academia and things like that...
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Declared by Will on Tuesday, October 9, 2007
My neighbours are miserable sacks of bones. They let their dog crap all over our backyard and when we finally called authorities to tell them to stop it, they try getting back at us. e.g. They tried to con my family from $1600 because moist, summer grass apparently scratched their car. Those whiny, pathetic...
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Declared by Anonymous on Sunday, December 19, 2010
Nothing looks more idiotic than a guy wearing lace shorts. This has to be one of the dumbest, crappiest-looking fads.
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Declared by anonymous lady on Sunday, June 4, 2017
dini huera fraueschüss bim tschüttele göndmer sowas vu uf dnüss
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Declared by Flo on Monday, October 8, 2007
Tell me about the gawd-dawg soup mix, NOW!
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Declared by Chris S. on Tuesday, October 16, 2007
I send hate missiles raining down on you. And your phone, since you obviously don't use it.
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Declared by Anonymous on Thursday, January 22, 2009
May the fleas of 1,000 camels infest all your orifices for lying to your friends about how I'm a stalker & you ended it years ago- when you were still seeing me.
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Declared by Anonymous on Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Fuck you David you sniveling pathetic little weasel, fuck you and all your time wasting bullshit, stop ringing me about stupid trivial matters and get the fuck on with your job you absolute moron! accusing us of ripping you off,and all your bullshit imaginary situations that never fucking happen, you...
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Declared by Anonymous on Saturday, December 15, 2012
been in love with my friend for the longest time! we even kissed once (after a few drinks)...it never progressed into anything more though...he is now asking me to fix him up with a friend of mine who he met. he told me she is the kinda gal he would even propose to!
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Declared by zaza on Thursday, December 27, 2012
Andrew
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Declared by Andrew on Monday, May 25, 2015